European Union Chooses Dr. Frankenstein as New Leader
In a press briefing, EU spokeswoman Olive Liv Agen-Eegorr announced the election of Frankenstein and commented, "He is the perfect man for the job. He has extensive experience in reviving the seemingly unrevivable. Besides, he is clearly part of the educated elite class of Western Europeans who consider themselves beyond the limitations of the common grubby man, and, furthermore, he is Swiss. What more can you ask for?"
Dr. Frankenstein, a native of Geneva, is expected to take office by the end of the summer. In a written statement, the doctor expressed his delight at being selected as the latest EUrocrat and noted, "It will be my pleasure and honor to revive the constitution. I will make it live . . . LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!! Ahem, er, in the fullest spirit of democracy, of course. Thank you."