Saturday, June 10, 2006

First Tropical Depression of 2006 Forms; Doctors Prescribe Zoloft

MIAMI, Florida -- (CNN -- Cyclone News Network) -- The first tropical depression of the 2006 hurricane season has officially formed in the Caribbean. Tropical depressions are weather systems which may develop into tropical storms and then into proper hurricanes.

In response to the tropical depression, several eminent doctors have immediately prescribed Zoloft, a well-known medication for treating depression and anxiety disorders.

Dr. Sigmund Sang-Froid told CNN, "It is a known fact that weather can affect human emotions. See for instance, Seasonal Affective Disorder. However, the medical community has not considered that the weather itself may have emotions and therefore emotional disorders. We should have thought of this long ago -- I mean, the very name 'tropical depression' should have been a signal! This hurricane season we hope to bring all our clinical expertise to the previously ignored problem of weather emotions.

"As for this first tropical depression of the eason, I recommend Zoloft and weekly therapy sessions."

2 Comments:

Blogger Don said...

One can only hope that Dr. Dang-Froid is allowed to prescribe Zoloft to the BBC and CNN 'journalists' who cover the hurricanes hitting the US come this autumn. "It's cool, dude" would be much better than the hysteria which they displayed last year.

Though perhaps LSD would be a better choice? "Hey, dig those crazy colours. Isn't that a great Mandela?" might be better still.

5:56 PM  
Anonymous Zoloft Side Effects said...

My name is Steven Martin and i would like to show you my personal experience with Zoloft.

I am 35 years old. Have been on Zoloft for 7 months now. This med did clear up the PPD, but weaning off of it has been absolute HELL. I got/am still getting the "zaps" that so many others talk about. Had I known it would be like this, I would have requested a different med. I will NEVER take this med again under any circumstances!

I have experienced some of these side effects -
Weight loss, upset stomach

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Steven Martin

3:07 AM  

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